Happy Love Week!

It's love week and I'm sure you've been swarmed by seas of reds and pinks in all shades. I found the above animation of a Brooklyn couple share the endearing story of their love and loss on a blog I visit quite often. I hope that all looking for love someday find the love that's the best fit. Happy Love Week! {Animated by Story Corps}

Charity Tuesday {End It Movement}

Modern Day Slavery and human trafficking are much larger issues than the mainstream press has given any attention to in the past decade. It is astounding that in our present day, humans, mostly women and children are being trafficked across local and international borders and sold in a manner that some have argued rivals the Trans-Atlantic Slave Trade. I highlighted an organization last week that was doing its part to rescue slaves that have been caught in this unfortunate market. I can be much of an optimist in some situations, however, I am weary of slogans and attempts at ending or eradicating ills of any sort. I do not believe such feats are possible because honestly they are not. What I believe we can do is educate people on the ills that plague our world from enslavement to hunger and diseases and hope that every human who is aware will play a role in rescuing [a] person from whatever prison walls they are trapped behind. If one person is rescued, that is one less slave, one less hungry child...I believe you get the idea. Thus, today, I am featuring an organization I am familiar with, Generation 268, that is affiliated with Passion City Church in the city of Atlanta. Generation 268 began a powerful movement, "End It Movement" that seeks to rescue enslaved individuals. On February 27, 2014, the End It Movement hopes to spur individuals across the globe to join in an awareness drive on the issue. To find out more information on how to join the movement please click here.

5 Instagram Accounts You Should Follow

1. Refinery29

Refinery 29 is your one stop location for tips on fashion, beauty, travel, entertainment, shopping and hot spots in some major cities. Their instagram account is one of my favorites because of the high quality photographs that are always so colorful and nicely styled. I've been following their account for months now and doubt that I've seen a picture that hasn't made me take a second look. 

2. Travel Noire

The brain child of a few wanderlusts, travel noire invites followers to submit pictures of locations they've been to and tries to encourage people of color to ditch the high priced items in their wardrobes and pay for experiences instead. 

3. thecoveteur

The coveteur is your go to source for nice glossies of high fashion. Visual stimulation at its very best. 

4. Yale

Although Yale University did not accept me into its law school, I still love their instagram account that captures the beautiful architecture of the campus. 

5. Andrearhowey

I ran into Ms. Howey in a coffee shop in Mansfield and noticed she was doing the most beautiful lettering I had seen in a while. I stopped by her table, we had a converstion and now she fills my instagram feed with amazing messages of hope, grace, and love. 

What to Do While Unemployed

A reprint from my article originally published in Levo League

A few months after graduate school I was unemployed and unable to find a job. Initially, I enjoyed having free time on my hands to catch up on some books, watch some television and basically have no deadlines to meet or meetings to plan or attend. However, after about three weeks of free time, including planning my 25th birthday, I began to feel the nagging pull of having no structure. I was no longer scouting for restaurants or shopping for party favors or trying to decide on a theme for my birthday. I was now 25, in my parent’s home and unemployed. Luckily, I had worked all throughout graduate school and had saved a good deal of money. Thus, I wasn’t worried about money, but knew I would eventually have to find a source of income.

Being unemployed is one of those interesting phases in life that provides an opportunity to learn about ourselves and about others. About ourselves because we are hardly preoccupied and there is ample time for a lot of introspection. About others because we are able to observe the perception some have of those who are unemployed, which can run the gamut from seeing the unemployed as lazy, complacent, or sometimes as individuals with little foresight or ambition. However, there are a good number of people who will show some empathy while you experience this challenge.

In reality though, unemployment can happen to anyone. George W. Bush became unemployed after he left the White House in 2009 and who knows what emotions he brooded over as he left the job he had held with so many rights and privileges for eight years?

Undoubtedly, being unemployed can be daunting, but having some reprieve from a job that demands so much of our time can be an experience to be treasured if we face the challenge with some perspective.

What to Do While Unemployed

Calm down and have some perspective

While being unemployed can be unnerving, take a moment to have some productive introspection. I would suggest making a list of things to be thankful for; housing, reliable transportation, good health, dependable and understanding friends, family, and even pets. Having perspective is certainly good. Understand that being unemployed is only temporary, regardless of how long the phase of being unemployed lasts for. Be reminded that seasons change and winter is not eternal.

Take care of your mental health

While facing the challenge of being unemployed, do not neglect your mental health. Listen to your body and make sure you pay attention to your mind. You surely might get into a funk while you wait for that job interview, so pay attention to your emotions. Is it a temporary brooding that lasts for a few minutes or have you fallen into a deep abyss and feel hopeless? Regardless of the duration of feeling in a funk, find someone to talk to and, if you can afford it, seek professional help. Also, be aware that life does not stop happening while you wait to find a job. Friends will get employed, take fancy vacations, buy new cars and celebrate milestones. It might be hard to not get blue or feel left out and this is why it is important to care for your mind and if need be, unplug from social media and focus on your needs and caring for yourself.

Have a support system

Remember that no man is an island. Surround yourself with people who are genuinely interested in your success and happiness. These people could be from your family or friends. Also, it could be just one person you can depend on that will hold you accountable and make sure you job search daily, arrange meetings, follow up on leads and mostly importantly are will provide a listening ear when you need to vent. Don’t approach the challenge of trying to find employment alone. You will need some support and do not refuse meaningful help when it is offered.

Plan, plan, and then plan some more

Approach everyday with a plan. Searching for a job can be a full time job. Invest in a notebook book or several notebooks that will serve as planners and journals. Have a weekly plan that includes a list of employers you are interested in contacting, names of people you meet, a quick summary of the outcome of the meetings, and a follow up strategy. If a notebook seems old fashioned, create an Excel spreadsheet, but visit your notebook or spreadsheet daily, make revisions to the plan, and journal your thoughts at the end of every day. Having a plan not only helps you stay organized, but it will help in answering questions about your search because you have had the time to organize your thoughts and formulate a plan. You will more likely be taken seriously than if you don’t have a plan and instead face each day without much thought or a concrete strategy.

Donate your time

Giving can be empowering. Find an organization with a cause you are interested in and find a way to give back. It could be a few hours a day or it could be a daily commitment. Volunteering while unemployed is empowering because it can provide some structure. It gives you a place to go at certain times during the week. Thus, the feeling of powerlessness is somewhat tamed because there is a task at hand to be done. I would suggest volunteering not because it benefits you, but because it serves the organization. Do it without the expectation of a reward and allow yourself to be surprised by what yields you gain. Not only will you have some structure and a sense of accomplishment, but it will also provide something to put on your resume for employers who might be wary of gaps in your employment history. I volunteered at an elementary school library close to my parent’s home while I was unemployed. All I did was shelve books (I love children’s books), check books out, and help prepare for the spring book fair. However, it was rewarding watching the little children come in daily and I gained so much decorating inspiration from the unique classroom arrangements.

Go start!

Sometimes, the best things in life happen when we build our own doors rather than wait for others to invite us to walk through the doors they carefully crafted. Being unemployed can be a great opportunity to become an entrepreneur, providing not only employment for yourself in the interim, but creating something that could flourish and someday provide employment for others. Explore ideas and do not be afraid to start something. Worse case scenario, it fails and who knows, it just might succeed and prove to be the opportunity you have been waiting for all the while.

File Under: Pathological Liar

My Dad and I had barely driven for a minute when my phone beeped indicating I had a new email. I pulled out my phone from my pocket and read the message. My Dallas bound flight from Atlanta had been cancelled. It was Tuesday and the weather was rather crisp despite warnings of an impending 'snow storm.' We turned around and headed back home to see if I could rebook my flight and still leave that evening. The lady I spoke to in the customer service department was uncertain that the evening flight would leave and gave me the option of calling at my convenience to rebook my flight. An hour after I hung up the phone, it started. The fluffy white stuff that would paralyze the city of Atlanta and result in harrowing 18-hour plus commutes came down and this time it stuck, all two inches of it came down hard and unforgiving. When I called to book my flight a few days later, I had to wait on the phone for over an hour and endure really poor customer service until I was finally scheduled to leave the city of Atlanta for Dallas on Friday.

This time, it was my Mom and I who headed out. She had a different flight to catch and I was Dallas bound. We left two hours early but then we got caught in bad traffic around the connector in the city known as Spaghetti Junction. I got to my gate at 11:19am, missing the gate closing by two minutes, after being held up by TSA. The next flight out of Atlanta for Dallas was scheduled to depart at 5:30pm. I called a friend of mine who lived nearby and she came and picked me up and treated me to lunch at Ruby Tuesday. She insisted on Ruby Tuesday because she swore they had some chocolate chip cookies that were irresistible. These cookies had to be baked for twenty five minutes and she placed the order after the check came. I was almost certain I might miss my flight again this time.

Finally the cookies came and we were on our way to the airport. When I got to the security line, one of my sisters called. I took the call and moved casually along the line because for the most part there were no travelers in sight. Finally when I got to the scanner, I nudged the phone between my ear and shoulder as I began taking off my boots, and then I looked behind me and there he was. He was very well dressed and also really good looking. I apologized to him and since there was no one else behind him, I told him he could go ahead of me so I wouldn't delay him. The young man whom I believe was in his early thirties told me to take my time and not worry about it. Not wanting to waste any more of his time, I told my sister I would call her back and hung up and struck up a conversation with the young man as we both waited our turn for the body scanner.

"So where are you headed?" I inquired.

"I'm going to Dallas." He replied.

"Oh cool, I'm going to Dallas as well."

"What airline are you flying?"

"Delta."

"I'm flying Spirit and you know I have stories for days."

"I don't mess with Spirit, I've had my fair share of bad experiences." He replied.

I ended my conversation with him as I was beckoned to come forward by the TSA agent. This time, I was lucky and managed to escape without being frisked or having my hair patted down. As I gathered my belongings, I noticed the young man was doing the same, so I thanked him again for being patient and wished him a safe trip and headed for the escalator going down to the train platform.

Shortly after I got on the train I noticed the young man get on as well. We made eye contact and he looked away as though he had never seen me before and I thought his behavior seemed rather strange. Thereafter, the train arrived at the D Terminal, where the same young man was apparently headed for as I was. As soon as the train came to a halt and the doors opened he bolted out and ran to get on the escalator. Again, I thought his behavior was rather odd and I began to feel sorry for him surmising that he was about to miss his flight and was panicking as a result. As I went up the escalator to my gate, I called my sister to resume our conversation. My gate was D9 and as I made my way to my gate, I passed the Delta gates where oddly enough, there was no boarding activity taking place. So, where was he running to? I walked from the D14 gate and finally arrived at D9 where boarding for my flight was in progress to find the young man standing in line to board the same Spirit Airline flight heading for Dallas that I was soon to be on.

Dear God in the heavens! Why did he lie to me?! Did he think he was too good looking or too nicely dressed for Spirit Airlines? Sure the flight cost all of $48.00 but shouldn't he have been proud that he was a savvy shopper and didn't pay more? What a devious soul! I got on the flight and didn't see him as I was seated on the eighth row and he was nestled somewhere in the back of the plane.

Normally, I sleep on flights, but I couldn't sleep this time. I sent my family members, which included my Dad, Mom, all my siblings and their spouses an account of what had just happened. I was really excited and wasn't about to let this guy off easily. So, once the plane landed, I got off quickly since I was seated close to the exit. Once I was outside the aircraft I waited for him to exit the plane and I believe he saw me once he deplaned but he kept on walking away. The walk from the gate to Baggage Claim is through a "tunnel" of sorts and there are no escape routes. I was right behind him and although he stole some glances over his shoulder he continued to advance steadily. Finally, I pulled out my phone called my Mom and put on the loudest, high-pitched Nigerian voice I could muster. At this point, I guess the shame was too much for him and the nearest exit was the ladies restroom. Now use your imagination and guess what he did. I am not making any of this stuff up. People are people and boy, what a piece of work that young man was!

Charity Tuesday {Somaly Mam Foundation}

I became aware of the Somaly Mam Foundation after reading the book "Half the Sky: Turning Oppression Into Opportunity for Women Worldwide," by New York Times author Nicholas D. Kristof and his wife Sheryl WuDunn. The book which stayed on the New York Times bestseller's list for many weeks chronicled the experiences of women across several countries and myriad issues confronting them running the gamut from maternal and fetal mortality challenges to sexual trafficking. The bottom line with most challenges women face is poverty. Poverty leads to may other grim issues, including physical and sexual abuse and is often the root cause of a lack of education. The result of deep seethed poverty is that women are often divested of any bargaining power they might have, further worsening their plight and the Somaly Mam Foundation featured below has embarked on a mission of strengthening women by addressing sexual trafficking. 

The Somaly Mam Foundation (SMF) is a nonprofit organization dedicated to the eradication of sex slavery and the empowerment of its survivors, led by the vision and life's work of Cambodian survivor and activist Somaly Mam. Founded in 2007, the organization's multilateral approach helps victims to escape their plight, empowers survivors with economic independence and as part of the solution, and engages governments, corporations, and individuals in the fight.

We work closely with partners in Southeast Asia, where the trafficking of women and children is widespread and where, for nearly two decades, Somaly and her team has rescued women and children from exploitation and abuse and assisted them on a journey to health, hope, and economic independence. Thanks to SMF, the outreach team and shelters have international support, and our Voices For Change survivor-leaders work as advocates, activists, and catalysts of next-generation change.

On a deeper level, we see the impact of this work in subtle shifts in cultural norms, in a proud network of entrepreneurial female survivors starting businesses and social enterprises, in open conversations on human trafficking in mass media, in strategic government and police partnerships, and in a growing trust in the rule of law, which is critical to combating corruption and protecting the victims. All of these are steps down a road to end sex slavery for good. (The information about the Somaly Mam Foundation was taken from the "Mission" section of the Somaly Mam Foundation webpage).

Disclaimer: The Harriet Project does not endorse the charities that are featured on Charity Tuesday. Before making a donation or getting involved in any capacity, please research the charities featured to make sure they are actually involved in the work they claim to be doing. 

Charity Tuesday {Rwandan Orphans Assistance Response (ROAR)}

Rwandan Orphans Assistance Response Incorporated (ROAR Inc.) is a non profit organisation based in Sydney Australia, whose mission is to improve educational outcomes of Rwandan orphans and disadvantaged children. We strongly believe that education is the key to the success of Rwanda’s future, the children of Rwanda. Our aim is to raise funds to assist disadvantaged children and orphans in rural areas of Rwanda in the area of education and health.
We work closely with primary schools in Rwanda to identify those children in need. We are committed to raising funds to help pay school related expenses such as uniforms, shoes and school supplies, on behalf of the orphans and disadvantaged children in Rwanda. To date we have assisted more than 1000 orphans and disadvantaged children at Linganwe School. This year we are extending our projects to include providing access to clean water to the children of Linganwe School, by building a well in the school, that the entire village can share (The information about ROAR was taken from the "About Us" section of the ROAR webpage).

Disclaimer: The Harriet Project does not endorse the charities that are featured on Charity Tuesday. Before making a donation or getting involved in any capacity, please research the charities featured to make sure they are actually involved in the work they claim to be doing.